My Novels

Monday, May 05, 2003

I haven't entered an update in several days, just haven't had time or been in the mood. Yes, bad moods DO prevent my writing in this journal sometimes.

Nothing really bad to cause my blues; I just have them occasionally. I still haven't put out the bulletins about pet sitting, but do have the flyers ready. I may do that in the next few days.

Over the weekend I rode my bike only Saturday afternoon; yesterday, Sunday, DH and I looked at another place out in the country. It's another foreclosure, with a fairly nice house and 16 acres. We're waiting to find out the price sometimes today. It is a lovely place, somewhat private but on a blacktop highway and not as isolated as the house/property at the dead end of a dirt road we had previously been thinking of buying. That place, unfortunately, is still tied up with the mortgage companies, and not yet available. The 16 acres are absolutely PERFECT for horses, which DH has. All of it is in open pasture, a big, pretty pond, and grass ready for the horses to chow down on. The house needs some work...but not a lot. Mostly it depends on the price, whether we get serious with this or not.

I have a dental appointment at 1:00 today, just a routine cleaning. Not my favorite thing to do!

It's stormy/rainy here, and we're under a tornado watch till around 7:00 tonight. I hope the worst of it misses us, unlike those unfortunate folks in the midwest who had horrible tornado damage and deaths last night. Tornadoes are serious threats here in the South too.

I am reading a book of essays by southern writers on why they write. Very inspiring. Makes me want to get back into my fiction writing again, and I may just do that. It was a wonderful escapist world while it lasted.

I did write a poem last night, and will post it here. However, be warned: it's grim, and one of the reasons I don't write much anymore. My work is just so depressing now. Why? Mainly because the older I get, the sillier humanity seems; and the whole shebang/human existence seems sheer folly and pointless. Not a pretty picture, huh?

Here's the poem:

The Door

Where is the door
To exit this human dream,
To escape the flesh of doom?
You know it is insane!

Where is the door
To leave this awful universe
Of suffering and suicidal swirl?
You know it is a farce!

Where is the door
I can't endure the crush
Of physical reality anymore;
Please, please tell me,
Where is the door
To escape this human world?

Pardon me if I go,
I don't want to be here anymore.

That's all for today.

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