My Novels

Wednesday, December 19, 2001

I had nightmares last night.

I hate it when I have these recurring nightmares with the same theme: my father is on a drunken rampage and I'm scared to death that someone is going to get killed. In this particular dream, me and my three sisters were in the house on the old block, a small four-room rental house where we grew up. And daddy was drunk, had beaten mother to within an inch of her life, and she'd fled the house (as she often did, leaving us girls there alone with daddy). He was standing at a window, looking out and asking, "I wonder where your mother went..." And I was trying to calm him down, sooth his anger (as I always did)...and though I knew he would not hit any of us girls (he never did), I was still scared. I also knew there was no escape, as we had no alternatives back in those days for such a horrible situation (like the abuse shelters today)...but I tried to be strong. Still, I awoke and was drenched in sweat, still shaking with fear.

I must say that since I don't believe in heaven/hell, I do think that for a person to have created such fear and hate in their children as my father did in us, his hell is that his memory is a nightmare to us.

When I went back to sleep, I had another jumbled nightmare, but cannot recall the details...more of the same about being unable to escape our hellish childhood. At any rate, this is typical stuff that comes up for me around the holidays, and one of the reasons I hate the season so much. I'm 50 years old, and STILL have these issues, so you can see that the damage is lasting.

I went on a long bike ride again this morning, and it was refreshing. Still very mild temps here in the Southeast, and looks like it will remain this way through Christmas.

Now to the news, I clipped this snippet about Bush pullling out of the 1972 Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty with Russia. {As an aside, I must say that I didn't approve of the Supreme Court appointing Bush as our Prez. I wasn't a fan of Gore either, but when the Supreme Court took the election away from the voters, I became skeptical of the High Court in general. I still consider Bush an 'appointed' Prez, simply because the Court didn't allow the votes to be counted.}

Here's the excerpt:

Cheney strongly supports Mr. Bush's decision to pull out of the 1972 Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty with Russia. "It was exactly the right step to take," the vice president said.

The fact that there has been only a mild international reaction to the treaty withdrawal is a sign Mr. Bush "did a masterful job" in dealing with a sensitive arms-control issue. "I think it's a major achievement for his administration and the fact that there has not been a loud reaction to it demonstrates the skill with which the whole enterprise was undertake.

"You know, nine or 10 months ago the cry was 'unilaterialism,' that somehow we were moving here in a way that went against the grain, or was going to be opposed by the civilized world. And of course what we've seen is that it was really all about leadership and the president stepped out, he had a good solid strategy. He's executed [that strategy] I think very well."

Nah, I just think that perhaps this move is more like a Dictator would make. Also, maybe Russia and all other countries are afraid we'll bomb their countries to hell and back if they dare disagree with us. And people here wonder why some foreigners think of the USA as a 'bully?'

Here's a semi-funny snip from an article about a protest in Canada concerning the new anti-terrorism laws there:

Santa Falls Foul of Anti-Terrorism Laws
OTTAWA (Reuters) - Canadian police, taking advantage of sweeping new anti-terrorism legislation, arrested Santa Claus on the grounds that he had a beard, was behaving suspiciously and, in all likelihood, belonged to a underground cell. Or so demonstrators would have you believe.

The ``arrest'' Monday was stage-managed by local pro-democracy activists who say that the legislation -- which the Senate, or upper house of Parliament, was due to start debating later Monday -- will destroy many civil liberties.

Enough rambling for today.

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