My Novels

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Oh my....

Here's the thing: It never seems to be over, done with, finished. You grieve, you weep, you think tomorrow will be better...but it's not.

And that is because you can't get over it until you go through the process of grieving...or so the experts say. Mainly what I've learned is that every widow/widower is "different" and however they feel IS right. In other words, there is NO right way to grieve and there is NO right way to mourn. You must do it on your own terms and in YOUR own way. To each their own.

One of my problems is that I seem to be unable to get out of bed in the morning. And whereas I always had a problem with insomnia before, now I just want to curl up in the bed and NOT get up in the morning. I feel like I could sleep all day, if I could just stay in bed. However, I DO have the cats to care for...and that does make me get up every day.

I don't know...this grief for the loss of a spouse...is soooo alien. I sometimes don't know what is coming at me next.

And so it goes...

3 comments:

Rurality said...

Hi CS, I've been away from blogging for a little while but wondered how you were doing. A couple of months ago we happened to drive by a place and saw miniature horses that looked so much like your old ones that I thought we'd found your old place! But then realized that there were dozens more horses and the people must be breeders.

Anyway, I hope you can get to feeling better. Sending you some hugs.

Have you read "The Year of Magical Thinking" by Joan Didion? (She discusses her grief over the death of her husband. At the same time, her daughter was ill with cancer.)

C.S. said...
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C.S. said...

Hey,
Glad you dropped by. I read on your blog you'd gotten lots of soap orders due to your product being featured in a magazine.

I'm doing fairly well, have my ups and downs. And yes, I have the book by Joan Didion; it's excellent, and I even have certain passages marked, to reread from time to time. My sister bought the book for me, and it has helped.

As for Festus & Ginger, I ended up selling them to a local lady that owns a furniture store. She and her husband have a big farm, and she's rescued two large horses in the past. I don't think she'll ever part with the little horses either, and she said I always have "visiting privileges!" I miss them, of course, but it helps knowing they have a good home.