I had a good visit with my sister and brother-in-law Monday/Monday night and Tuesday. The drive, though long, was actually fun -- once I quit worrying about a break-down and turned the radio up loud and just DROVE! :-)
My sister seems to recuperating well, right on schedule. She hopes to get the annoying two drains out next week, and that will surely be a relief. Monday night we watched a movie, "Birth" (an unusual theme on reincarnation) on their big screen TV. It was just like being at the theater, since they also have digital surround-sound speakers in the corners of their high-ceiling entertainment room. The movie was nothing special, but I'd almost forgotten how BEAUTIFUL everything looks on such a large screen with excellent acoustics!
During the past weeks I've been doing some serious "thinking/reflecting"...about not just my sister's condition, but about life/death itself. I have always thought that "quality over quantity" is important -- at least for myself. IF I should be diagnosed with cancer, I would NOT have any treatment. Why? For one thing, I'm not CERTAIN that all the radical treatment works for everyone -- and why put myself through such excruciating pain/suffering for no reason when I would die anyway? I HATE physical suffering, and having had enough of it when young, would choose to live what time I had left on my own terms. Yes, I'd want pain medication...unless it didn't help enough. At which point I would take my own life.
EVERYONE should have a choice about health matters, and that is MY choice. No one else's, just mine alone. And it would be the right choice for me. Besides, who knows, perhaps I'd outlive those who DO seek all that complex, painful treatment...but who die anyway.
Let's face it: Humans die, it's a FACT. We may live longer, but at what cost in pain? Or we can live less time, and live as we wish. I think so many people never confront their own mortality until a life-threatening event forces them to. I long ago went through the realization that we are ALL going to die, it's just a matter of time. And as a poet/writer, I have always explored mortality in my work. Otherwise it would all be shallow. Knowing my decision gives me peace now, and a certainty about how I would respond to a fatal illness, should I ever be diagnosed in that category.
Should we fear death? I think not. Whether it is sweet surrender to eternal rest/nothingness, or a blissful rebirth into whatever mysterious realm unknown to us humans...death is NOT the enemy.
I have been creative lately, and posted this poem at my website: Transformation Dream
And that is all for today.