Today's writing prompt seemed to strike my mood this afternoon:
List your bad habits and addictions and what you've tried to rid yourself of them.
Of course, my alcohol problem was one of the more horrendous I ever endured. I struggled an entire year trying to quit, but finally voluntarily entered inpatient rehab in October. After that, I stopped drinking...it helped that I was able to detox with medical assistance. The past six months had been hell on earth: trying to stop, then binging, blackouts (which I'd never had during the six years I drank). The last blackout I had was terrifying -- when I got sober. Apparently I visited with my sister, talked like I was fine, and had NO memory of it. Scary, enough so it sent me to rehab. I know I'll have to struggle against drinking -- but the easiest way to handle it for me...is simply don't drink. Don't have liquor in the house, where I usually did my drinking.
I am anorexic, and was treated for that while in rehab. In fact, being on a starvation diet (age 55, weighed 88 lbs.), led to the liquor. I was at the point I would hardly eat anything, but found that a drink made me hungry and I'd eat. So instead of starving, I started drinking. I've gained back to 105 lbs now, but like the liquor, it's an ongoing battle. I loved being skinny, feel as if I've accomplished something...weird.
I think, to some extent, writing is my positive habit. When I was writing my novels, short stories, poetry...I didn't obsess about my weight, nor ever think of a drink. Writing has saved me many times in the past -- whether I was going through serious stressful events, dieting or suffering from depression and anxiety. I could get lost in my stories and characters' lives...an escape. I hope to eventually regain that high, sweet bliss where I cease to exist and let my characters speak through me.
I'm sure I have other habits some would consider bad: Not very social, though I can rise to the occasion when necessary. Being content alone. Hate crowds. Most of the traits others might condemn, I consider my personality: introvert, independent to a fault, solitary, passion for pets/animals. I could go on, but that's enough.
Link to writing prompt: 80 Journal Writing Prompts
Balmy day, mild 70s, though mostly cloudy. Getting tired of the rain, and there's a musty smell in the air from endless rainy days. Mold and mildew thrive in this environment. Except for the neighbor firing up his grill, an entirely different smell -- which the dogs love!
Took them on walk, then baths. I usually give them a bath in my bathtub, though I do have a utility sink on the cats' porch. Unfortunately, the cats go ballistic if I put them in a separate room while using the utility sink to bathe the dogs.
Anyhow, after the tub baths, I have to scrub the tub/shower stall, and it's usually necessary anyway. (I prefer showers, hardly ever take a tub bath.) I had to mop the floors too, dogs tracking in and out from drenched yard....
Thus this day's entry ends. Hope to use a prompt every day as a way to get back into creative writing.